Day 2: Your First Love

I've never really been boy crazy.

From my 3 brothers to my gajillion boy cousins, boys have always been a part of my life. That's why I'm such a tom boy. That's what's making this post so difficult to, *ahem*, compose.

I'd have to say that my first crush was in 3rd grade. One day, we were sitting at our tables, minding our own businesses, when Mrs. Rogers calls our short-lived attentions to the front of the room. She introduced a new student. I'm kind (OK, really) embarrassed to say who it was, even though my friends from Manila will know who it was. I'll call him.... "Derek".

Derek was from a town that sounds like a tropical storm. His quick jokes and dimpled smile, plus the charm of an all new student quickly made him the king of our 15 kid class. That light brown hair, as well as the hazel eyes, made my 3rd-grade self fall. Hard.

Sadly, Derek wasn't afraid to be rude, and after one exchange, my poor inexperienced heart was crushed. I cried my eyes out that night.

I kept my distance from Derek for the rest of the year, but my heart hurt every time my muddy brown eyes met his clear hazel ones. Luckily, they moved that summer, and I was consoled.

I crushed on and off on a couple of boys for the rest of my elementary school years. Then, the summer before 6th grade, my parents pop the news. We're moving. To a tiny island in the middle of the Atlantic that none of us have ever heard of.

The American school there was very extremely small, so no cute boys there. There was this guy, however....

"Marcus" was from Utah. He was LDS (Mormon). He was a total hottie. My 6th-grade, not even in Young Womens yet! self fell hard. Again. Apparently, I hadn't learned anything from my experience with Derek. Long story short, we moved again, breaking my poor heart yet again. We still (sort of) keep in touch, and he's still cool. And, just like with Derek, I'm over him.

Eigth grade. Oh great. Here comes the shocker.

I first met "Tobias" in 7th grade. The blonde, blue-eyed saxophonist in my band class. The very first impression of him that I got was.... stuck up. He was snooty, self-absorbed, overconfident- well, you get the idea. I didn't like him one bit.

Then, in 8th grade, we had the same algebra class. 8th grade was when I started writing, so on this particular occasion I was writing the epic climax, as opposed to solving algorithms. Tobias, who sat next to me, was reading over my shoulder, and asked if he could read the whole thing. I gave him the chapter, and he promptly said that it was good. Really good.

Boys, a word of warning. If you pay a girl any sort of attention or give her any kind of compliment, she will transform into a flirt. A hopeless flirt. But she will only flirt with one person. You. Beware.

In light of this, we can say many things. I was in love. I had fallen for him. But, in a word, I was obsessed. As simple as that. I would daydream about him. While dancing to cheesy love songs. I would have dreams about going to prom and getting married to him. You get the idea.

Tobias and I also had English together. He sat next to me. Again. Not good. Me and my bad flirting self, were trying to, well, flirt with him. Some rather harsh words were exchanged, I was humiliated, somewhat in my head, and my heart was broken yet again.

Whoop de doo.

I saw him all that summer, because he's in my stake. I would see him dancing with some other girl at a stake dance, wishing he would come and ask me. Tall, awkward, socially incipient me. My head was still in the clouds.

Towards the end of July, I thought to myself That's it. I'm done. I'm not going to walk around in a funk any longer.

I got a totally new look. I chopped off my hair. I was confident and bubbly. And then, the 1st day of our freshman year swung around.

I hadn't noticed it, but he'd grown. A lot. Instead of being a head shorter than me, he was a full 3 inches taller than me. He was in two of my classes. (Big surprise? Band and English. Again.)

I realized something into the first week of school. I was making my self love him.

I know that it sound stupid and totally insane, but it was true. I was filling my head with lies. I was lying to myself. After I'd realized that, I was done.

I had closure.

Finally, after that exciting life story by yours truly, I have a lot of guy friends, but that's just it- we're friends. The only boy I truly don't like is "Stew". The only boys I can say I really love are boys in books.

Especially this one.

He's Austrian.

Drool......

"With an F and an R and an E an a D and an F-R-E-D Fred! Yeah!"